A Brief Retrospective
One year.
That's how long it's been, to the day, since this ended. And in that year? Well, I've had some interesting dating experiences.
Let's take an inventory:*
6 Stage five clingers...
3 Who misread what I wanted, projected their fears onto me, and used that to justify not dating me anymore...
2 Who made me think they were more into me than they were...
5 Whose personalities could be best summed up with "Whatever you want to do... I just want to make you happy..."
1 With a fuse so short that no one could ever figure out why she was mad...
4 Who would still come over right now if I called them...
1 Who made me feel like second best...
2 Skinny girls who thought they were fat...
3 Chubbier ones who thought they were super-skinny...
4 Hot nerds...
2 I could have seriously fallen in love with hard...
Many who had some growing up to do...
And a couple that made my heart hurt.
And those were just the ones who made it past the first date (please note: I'm not a whore -- there's quite a bit of overlap here). I've also had 2 stalkers (thanks, blogworld!) and a plethora of first dates that didn't go past that.
In other words, it's been a rough year, and I feel like I've been treading water. I don't feel like I'm any closer to the original goal. Strangely enough, as a grown man, I've got several goals in life, but the one I decided to focus on is the one it appears I've made the least progress towards. It seems like the only area in life where you can do all the right things and not make any progress anyway.
And I don't think it's that I'm looking in the wrong places. I've met these people just about everywhere: the internet, bars, through friends, the gym, at parties, normal everyday life... you name it, I've gotten a date or two out of it. I just don't know what to try next.
I'm this close to running off to become a monk. Or maybe moving away to start over in a new place. I'm feeling very unsettled at the moment.
Fuckin' women.
Disclaimer: If you're about to leave an anonymous comment about how arrogant I am, fuck off. Seriously, take it somewhere else. I'm not saying I'm perfect by any stretch of the imagination, just that I'm disillusioned and a little bitter today.
* If I've dated you this year, don't get offended. This is about my frustration with dating in general, not with you. In fact, you're probably not even on that list -- you're special.
15 comments:
Don't lose hope! and I wish I had something more inspiring to say, but if makes you feel any better you're def not alone in this struggle (I'm there with ya!).
Word.
Sometimes I want to become a nun.
But there's ONE reason I couldn't...... :-)
Ok, MAYBE more than one reason....
Man, I felt every word of this. When exFiance and I split up I wanted to throw things and scream out of frustration at the whole thing...and the thought of dating again. (shudder)
You're a good man Charlie Brown. Hang in there.
You've been through the ringer. I'm buying you that beer I owe you at the next blogger happy hour and another one (or a shot? whiskey on the rocks?) for making it through this year with some sense of hope in tact (even if you are bitter today).
You're sooo arrogant!
just kidding:)
You seem depressed. I'm going to give you some unsolicited advice...trash your goal. Don't place so much importance on finding the perfect girl for you. She probably doesn't exist. There seem to be a lot of girls out there that want to spend some time with you so stop being so picky and take advantage. Who knows...perhaps one of them will grow into something special. Think positive and good luck.
actually, this posting sounded like sad reflections to me, until i got to the bitter and disillusioned disclaimer. i hope things go better for you in the near future.
-jm
You should be arrogant. You're awesome, right?
Maybe three reasons.
But I still hear you! Dating is SCARY. I'm doing SOMETHING now that I haven't done in six years! I don't know if it's dating, but it SOMETHING.
I love it - "Fuckin' Women", you say.. Well allow me to say "Fuckin' Men."
Except maybe the 1% of semi decent maybe sort of interesting ones.
Stop fishing for compliments, you arrogant manwhore.
Kidding. Daaaamn -- even with some overlap that's more people than I've dated in ... my whole life. Waah.
...must resist....urge to add in...tired cliche...about...love...coming...when you're....not...looking....for it....
...must resist urge......
I loved my stalkers like I love herpes and jock itch.
Men can't be from Mars and women from Venus, because at the end of the day we both feel the same way about this situation... keep your chin up cutie.
I'm with swf41.
Thats quite a few dates for just a year. I and plenty of other women I know would kill for those numbers (even the slightly mental ones).
Insert general cliche of "guys have it so much easier when it comes to dating than girls do" here.
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